Who am I?

I was reading this morning in Exodus 3 you know the story. Moses is on the far side of the desert. A former prince of Egypt, now a fugitive shepherd, and he has just seen a burning bush and gone over  to check it out and been called into God’s service. Moses is told to go to Egypt and tell Pharaoh to let his people go. Moses makes excuse after excuse, but there is a moment that floored me. Moses asks in Exod 3:11, “who am I that I should go…” Have you ever felt that same insecurity? 

I have and I do. 

My internal dialogue goes something like this: Your not tall enough, you don’t speak well enough, you don’t measure up, you sin often, you aren’t good enough. Maybe your internal dialogue is similar. I wrestle with insecurity a lot. I have discovered that this place of insecurity inside of me is one of the biggest struggles I have wrestled with as a follower of Jesus. Unchecked insecurity can lead us to remain in the desert of despair and self-defeat. 

Most of the time I get stuck in the question. Who am I? Our enemy and the world we live in tells us we are the product of random chance. We are some cosmic accident. We hear things like, you only live once and if it feels good, do it. And so we do. But, we know that this line of thinking is wrong. Today, I was especially struck by the next verse. God says to Moses, “I will be with you…” (Ex 3:12)

I love this. The answer to Moses’ identity crisis is God. Who is Moses?

He is a God called one
He is a God sent servant
He is a God guided one
He is a God protected one
He is a God created one

He is not defined by his failures. God doesn’t see Moses as the fugitive shepherd, but as a deliverer of his people. God invites Moses into an incredible journey. 

He is one in and whom God is present

Moses learns that in his greatest insecurity, God is present with his people.

I was feeling low today, wrestling with “who am I?” kind of day, and then God spoke to me through his word.

I am too a God called one
I am too a God sent servant
I am too a God guided one
I am too a God protected one
I am too a God created one
I am too a God haver
One in and whom God is present

I am not defined by my past, my failures or my insecurities. God has invited me into a journey of following and sharing Christ. 

We know the rest of Moses’ story! He leads Israel out of Egyptian slavery. He doesn’t succumb to inaction because he wrestles with insecurity. He anchors his life in the unfolding story of God. We would be well to do the same!

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About Jason Retherford

The random musings of a youth minister.
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